Relationships, Pillow Fucking and Chocolate.

Question:
Well where on earth should I start?

First of all I've hit a small writers block as of late and I'm not sure what's stumped me although it could be the various other issues buzzing around in my head. I am having issues with men as usual for I simply cannot seem to enter and stay in a meaningful relationship. I only know for fact one man recently who wanted to be serious with me and I found myself backing out of that relationship. I have even now grown more fond of him as I was never truly done with him emotionally, but the recent date between us seemed to have ended sourly when I accidently embarassed him by refusing his advances while he had his pants at his knees... I should not be ashamed to admit how many men I have had... sexual romps with, but I feel that I should be at times. It is not an outlandsh number, but I certainly am getting up there. I feel more in the ranks of a man whore than a socially accepted woman. 15 different men. Is that too many? I already think I should slow my roll, but am I freaking out over nothing? Is that ok? I remember all of their names if that's any consolation.... I mean really is it so wrong for a woman to enjoy sex? Granted I didn't want things to begin and end with Sex... Anyway it's getting to the point where I'm afraid to have sex with men because I think it will end up ending there... The one that was trying to be serious with me certainly scared me when we ended up having sex sooner than I wanted to and then I tried to kind of back out of sex and that lead to me backing out of the relationship... I certainly don't know what to do. I also find that I become attracted to men that are semi unattainable and when I say this I mean that they are single, but they are not near by. Other states and far off cities keep us apart. Why is it that online men seem to like me better? Anyway as a man I'm sure you could give me SOME sort of insight on how to have a guy commit to attempting a serious relationship with me... It may just be time for me to get out the rope and start hogtying me some men. They can't get away that way anyway haha.

He Says:

Writers block; it happens to the best of us. There's really nothing you can do, forcing it will just add to the frustration. Just take some time off and come back when inspiration strikes you. Or just sit down and write the first things that pop into your head. That's what I do and I get away with calling it art.

Next, you need to decide what makes a relationship meaningful. I agree with Lily, there are several things you have to be introspective about before you can try and take on someone else. How did you embarrass him with his pants down? Did you just shut the gate, so to speak, or did you laugh at him. The second one is very very bad. If you're honest with him, and yourself, I'm sure you can work thins out. If not, that means he's given up because you weren't ready to put out and that's not a relationship anyway. When it comes to sex, it's women that have all the power. And rightly so. You are letting someone else actually INSIDE you. Us guys don't consider it the same way. I knew a guy that used to fuck his pillow. Seriously.

Ah, yea. The magic number. If girls want to be equal to men, they need to get rid of the stigma. That's right, it's other women that make this an issue. As a guy, I know any girl I'm with has been with other guys, that's OK. It's nothing to be ashamed of. If you feel like there is something wrong with it, that's you telling yourself to slow down, listen to that voice. And, most importantly, don't let ANYONE make you apologize for your past.

As for you falling for people online is simple; technology is ruining relationships. You fall for someone over the computer that you've never met because of the false sense of intimacy it provides. You can say anything, be yourself completely, yet still keep up your walls because there's a screen separating you. It's easy to be open when you don't have to look the other person in the eyes.

And with that, I'll leave you with this gem; never rule out hogtying, that's just good fun.

She Says:

Wow. We asked for one question and you brought us several. Was this really even about your writers block? Try writing porn. Sex romps on paper may not be best sellers, but you might get yourself out of writers’ constipation.

I know what you are going through and your concerns are completely justified. However, you have too many concerns. Your right- slow your roll, woman! You are focusing on many issues with yourself and not any solutions.

Now let us talk about the sex. You are so concerned about how much you enjoy sex. My advice: stop it. Who cares how many partners you have had as long as you are being careful? You like to ride. Who doesn’t? I like chocolate. I eat it a lot. In fact, I have eaten it more times than you have had sex. Do you think I am a bad person? Fuck you then! Just kidding, my point is everyone does what he or she enjoys and you just happen to enjoy a lot of in the bed disco. If you want to continue to enjoy sex, I suggest never getting married. Again, I am just kidding. Sort of. The problem is you do not have your craving under control. It is time for me to introduce….. Sex-Watchers! First date orgasm- 75,000 points. Third date orgasm- 2. You keep it under ten points and you will be gravy, baby.

When you meet a new man and you decide to go on a date, have a game plan. Promise yourself that no matter how much your thighs tingle with want, that you will not have sex with this person until *insert whatever date you want here*. That way, the relationship might actually become a relationship and you won’t have to worry about it beginning with sex. If you follow your game plan, reward yourself with a lovely bubble bath and some quality time with your vibrator. (Don’t have a vibrator? That might be the majority of your problem)

Now you have the no-sex secret. The next step in actually having a relationship is finding out why you are attracted to whatever is not attracted to you. This part is all you. No amount of vibrating stimulation is going to help you on this one. We are talking hard- core Freudian shit now. You claim you want to be in a relationship, yet you are constantly being involved with people and doing things to force you to play the role of booty call and not girlfriend. That says to me that you most likely do not want a relationship, and the question I have to ask there is why? Now, I do not know the answer. You do.

Once you figure all that out, call Mr. Woulda Been Serious and ask him on a date. Stick with the game plan, sister! Be strong. If all goes well, go on a second date. So on and so forth. Now run my little sex minion to the nearest New Fine Arts!

A little KY goes a long way!

And that does it for today. If you would like to comment or have a question you'd like us to ramble on about, email us at disenchantedyouths@gmail.com

Who wants some discount therapy?

Hello, there. My name is Davlin and I'm not accompanied by my partner Lily this evening. This means I'll have a rare opportunity to say pretty much whatever I want on this entry. Poop. See? Freedom is fun!

Sorry, it's out of my system now. This site that you have stumbled upon or had shoved down your throat by us is here to help you. First, I should probably mention for legality reasons that neither of us have any psychological experience (not from the doctor's side, anyhow) and take the advice we give at your own risk. If you're wondering why we're even qualified to do this, well, we really aren't. But if you check out my blog, you'll see how truly fucked up I am and know that I will give good advice on how not to repeat any of my mistakes.

As I said earlier, this site has been created for YOU. If there's anything you wanna talk about, and I do mean anything, just email it to disenchantedyouths@gmail.com. I guarantee you it will at least be entertaining.


Hope to hear from you,

Davlin

PS: I want to apologize for how the site looks. It is only temporary and we will approve on the look and feel of everything in the weeks to come. One more time before I go. Poop.